Apparently weather reads my blog, because she sure learned her lesson. I wake up this morning and it is sunny and (presumably) warm, because all the snow from yesterday's freak blizzard is gone. This means two things. Firstly, I actually have to work today (actually cooler than it sounds, because my job is breaking shit with a sledge hammer). Secondly, it means I have to postpone my plans for interdimensional warfare against the embodiments of nature. Don't worry, keep designing your skeletal space ships of monstrous horror. We'll find a use for them eventually. But for now, I have a target a little closer to home.
As everyone (and by everyone, I mean very few people) knows, I run a daily vlog in which I film my daily comings and goings. With this being the case, I like looking at the Tube of You to 1) check my viewership, 2) watch inspiring videos, 3) get a giggle out of life. However, YouTube is being, shall we say, a huge asshole lately.
The problem is that it won't even load the front page. It consistently crashes any browser I use, from Safari to Firefox to Chrome to Opera. And if you say use Internet Explorer, you deserve the mauling that bear is going to give you later. (I assume this is the case, since anyone who uses IE clearly lives in a forest somewhere, and probably wears a suit made out of meat [love you :)]).
This is a huge problem for me that I have yet to figure out. I know that all Browsers have problems. Chrome, while fast, has a tendency to crash for no reason. Firefox, with all it's add-ons, becomes slow and ungainly. Safari is dull and unexciting. And Opera is...well, Opera is the kid in primary school who eats glue and calls himself Horatio even though his name is Josh. He's special, everyone loves him and he definitely makes class more fun, but no one wants to chill with him at recess.
Sidenote, that kid is now an advanced pre-med student, he gets beautiful women on a frequent basis and drives a Jaguar as his "shitty car". And it turns out his middle name is Horatio, which he now goes by. If that becomes the case with Opera, my mind will be blown all over the wall.
Anyways, you can see how this would be a problem. A person who makes a YouTube video every day may just want to be able to go onto YouTube. It's frustrating, annoying, and I can't think of a way to blame Vampires, Werewolves, Zombies or Gargoyles, so I'm stumped.
I'm sure that there is a work-around or a fix (the Internet is widely accepted as a home of nerds, so there has to be), but I can't flipping find one. I'm a 9th Degree Black Belt in Search Fu (my Torrent Kick will shatter sternums) but I can't find this one fix.
At this point the only explanation is Black Magic. I've been cursed by a witch, warlock, sorcerer, vodoun priest or some such thing. It may not seem the most logical explanation, but it is easier to admit than, let's say, having too many programs junking up my hard drive or something.
As everyone knows, the only cure for a curse is hard work, elbow grease and a bumblebee's tears. With this as food for thought, I'm going to go smash some concrete and dig a foot-deep trench through my backyard.
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